gather and follow
by gedatsu-kitteh
Summary: Forgive them Father. They know not what they do.AU.ZADR. For Dib believing is everything. [most unlikely fic to ever be written EVER]
1. Chapter 1

Gather and Follow

By gedatsu-kitteh

There was always something about reality that bored Dib to death. The way people lived was too shallow for him; constantly worrying about grades, clothes, jobs, and just getting by from day to day. He needed more; he had to know if there was more. Unlike most people's beliefs Dib, though being a man of science, was actually very religious, in his own way at least.

Dib believed in God; only because atheists' explanations of "We're here just cuz." didn't really appeal to him. And maybe it really wasn't just as simple as "just cuz", but was related to Charles Darwin, the Theory of Evolution, the Big Bang and so on and so fourth. But Dib being the curious child he was, after weeks of research he came to the conclusion that there was no possible way that the universe could be created as perfectly as it was just by the element of chance. There was something controlling it. Human beings had _souls_- a spiritual element- they couldn't have just been put on Earth to reproduce into all of eternity.

Dib was only four when he came to this conclusion. He began keeping journals and logs of coincidences, how everyone he met affected his life, how one event perfectly set up an atmosphere for another. Dib became obsessed with analysis and discovering meaning and truth behind every single blade of grass, and soon won himself his first trip to the asylum.

It wasn't that serious, he had heard someone say to his dad. He wasn't prone to violence so he wouldn't have to be locked in a cell, but he would have to stop by for therapy everyday for two hours. They said they had caught him early so it was okay. He would be okay.

Dib remembered how big he thought that room was. He remembered the smooth leather of the chair he sat in every day for two hours. He remembered the strange cracks on the ceiling and how sometimes they looked like people. One looked like it was holding a gun to its head. He remembered vaguely asking God what exactly it was He was trying to tell him about this place.

After a while he didn't have to go anymore because the place had been shut down due to some doctors poisoning their patients. Dib wondered if they would have to sit in big leather chairs and talk for two hours as well.

Dib knew the only reason he was out of that place was because of God. God had saved him for a reason.

What was that reason?

Why am I special, God?

What makes me special?

Dib began reading the Bible.

Dib decided that he loved God. He cared so much about his creations and Dib wanted to care about His creations too. He read how His people had betrayed Him so many many times, yet He stilled saved them. He still loved them.

"Forgive them Father. They know not what they do."

Dib collapsed back in his chair wrapped in awe, repeating the last line he had just read to himself.

"Wow…"

Many boys his age had super heroes. Of course _their_ super heroes were Batman, Superman, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Dib's hero was God. At first no one seemed to mind, but as he grew older people began criticizing him, calling him names, like "homophobe" or "oppressor". Dib knew where these names derived from. He decided it would be best to keep his hero to himself.

"I'm sorry..." He knew God was disappointed in him. He threw his arms into the night sky trying to plead. "I just don't know what to do anymore! People won't listen to me…" He frowned up at the stars who twinkled back at him sadly. "I'm always alone…" Warm wind blew through his ebony locks. God was listening. "Please God… send someone- _anyone!_ Just as long as they're like me… I need to know I'm not the only one."

Dib knew the emptiness that was being alone. He was only eight years old.

Dib had an obsession with mysteries. He needed to know everything about everything. He needed the truth.

He remembered passing by a magazine stand once, one of the covers caught his curious eye. There was a large mop of hairy monster on the front and read: _Mysterious Mysteries: Bigfoot?_

What's Bigfoot…?

He paid the man behind the counter and sped off to find a place to sit. Dib was hooked.

Dib is now twelve years old.

"Hey Gaz, you know how they have those alien autopsy videos on youtube?"

A grunt came in response.

"Well I've been thinking lately…"

"You never _stop_ thinking _Dib_…" A squinted eye slit open and glared.

"…How could our technology advance so quickly without outside influence? I mean sometimes its just _crazy_ to think about how in a few hundred years we went from horses to cars. The government _must_ have fou-"

"_Dib!_"

Dib's head whirled around to face his sister. "Yeah Gaz?"

"Shut up."

Dib stops dead in his tracks and stares blankly ahead as she walks right past him.

"You'll never know what it's like to have no one to listen to you."

She didn't hear him. _No one_ heard him. No one was listening. Except God who always had his ear pressed against Dib's lips.

Dib looked at the floor. A key. What? There was a key lying next to his foot.

He smiled as he bent down to pick it up. He held it up to his face for inspection and slowly twirled it between his fingers.

God was always listening.


	2. Chapter 2

Dib loved to dream. Dreaming opened up another world to him; another dimension where almost anything was possible. Dib had a theory that dreams actually _were_ other dimensions, ones created by our own minds.

Dib frowned for a moment; his train of thought coming to a disappointingly abrupt halt. If that were true, didn't that mean that _anything_ could be real? Did that mean crazy people weren't crazy?

Dib's brows knitted together in concentration. His chin rested in his palm, while his teeth busily chewed on little stubby fingernails.

So that meant that all things imaginary weren't _really _imaginary. But didn't that just contradict the definition of imaginary? What if to make something real, all you had to do is believe in it? Did that mean God wasn't really _real? _But then at the same time he was because Dib believed in Him, so if his theory were true God _was_ real, but only because Dib chose to believe so. …Hmm…That _sort of_ made sense.

Dib bit his lip, a sorrowful expression washing over his face. He didn't like it when he couldn't prove his own ideas to himself. He also didn't like it when he knew he was just looking for excuses to make the world more interesting.

Is that what this all was? Believing in things to make the world more interesting? Inserting a deeper meaning into everything instead of extracting one?

Dib propped his elbows up on his bed, kneeling on the floor. He looked at the key wedged between the palms of his hand. But he'd found this today… didn't that mean something? _Anyone could've found a key you know…_

But he had been having strange dreams lately. With keys. And doors. And… and…

Dib scrunched up his face trying to remember.

…And _something_…

_It was so smooth… so smooth and cool to the touch. _

…letmetouchitletmetouchitletmetouchit…

_They glittered like little stars in the sky. …So bright…oh so very bright… Hello hello._

…pleasepleaseplease…

_He could feel the excitement pump through his veins. You wanted this you wanted this. You asked for this and now you almost have it. Sometimes there can only be perfection in imperfection._

…pleaseplease…

_Nothing could ever steal his breath like this. This was what he was looking for. This was what he wanted._

_You wanted this._

…let me touch it… oh _please_ let me…

…_only __**I**__ can let you have it…_

…_pleasepleaseplease…_

…_only __**I**__ can…_


End file.
